Fast food drinks have evolved from simple refreshments to full-blown calorie bombs. Somewhere between the upsizing craze of the early 2000s and today’s sugar-loaded shake menus, we forgot that a drink was ever meant to just quench thirst. Now, many of these “beverages” pack more calories than the burger they come with, and in some cases, more than the entire meal.
This isn’t a crusade against every frozen mocha or whipped cream-topped shake. But when a drink pushes 1,000 calories and half your day’s saturated fat, you have to admit that it deserves a closer look because some of these so-called beverages deliver more damage than the combo meal they accompany.
On that note, let’s dig into the worst offenders.
8. Checkers & Rally’s Chocolate Shake (Large — 32 oz)
Calories: 720 | Sugar: 92g
The Issue: This one’s sneaky—huge volume, massive sugar spike, and a portion size that would make a soda from the 1980s weep. It’s basically dessert dressed up as a drink, served in a bucket.
7. Dunkin’ Vanilla Bean Coolatta (Large — 32 oz)
Calories: 790 | Sugar: 167g
The Issue: This drink contains no caffeine or fruit and offers minimal nutritional value. It’s essentially a sugar glacier in a cup. The name suggests something breezy and refreshing, but you’re basically sipping on over 40 teaspoons of sugar.
6. McDonald’s Strawberry Shake (Large — 22 oz)
Calories: 850 | Fat: 21g | Sugar: 107g | Total Carbs: 143g
The Issue: This shake packs more than three times the daily recommended limit of sugar. The “strawberry” component is heavily processed syrup. Despite containing some actual fruit, the shake is dominated by artificial flavors, a high calorie count, and a cocktail of stabilizers and preservatives.
5. Jamba Juice Peanut Butter Moo’d Smoothie (Large — 28 oz)
Calories: 965 | Fat: 29g | Sugar: 123
The Issue: Jamba markets the Peanut Butter Moo’d Smoothie as a health food. It’s not. This smoothie hides behind yogurt, bananas, and peanut butter, but with 122 grams of sugar and more calories than a Big Mac, the only thing it’s nourishing is your next insulin spike.
4. Sonic OREO Peanut Butter Master Shake (Large)
Calories: 1,020 | Sugar: 151g | Saturated Fat: 33g
The Issue: Sonic took two beloved childhood treats—OREO cookies and peanut butter—and weaponized them into a 1,020-calorie sugar bomb. The 151 grams of sugar means you’re essentially drinking a jar of frosting with cookie chunks floating in it. It’s the kind of drink that makes you question whether fast food has officially jumped the shark.
3. Wendy’s Caramel Frosty Shake (Large)
Calories: 1020 | Sugar: 155g
The Issue: Built from their vanilla Frosty base and then amped with caramel syrup, this sweet monster is nearly equivalent to three Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers—except you can drink it in under five minutes.
2. Sonic Java Chiller Caramel (Large)
Calories: 1,220 | Fat: 57g
The Issue: Nothing else comes close. This espresso-flavored fat trap delivers the calorie count of four cheeseburgers, laced with whipped cream, syrup, and sugar by the pound. A drink this deadly should come with a surgeon general’s warning.
1. Dairy Queen Peanut Butter Shake (Large — 24 oz)
Calories: 1250 | Sugar: 89g
This drinkable dessert packs the caloric punch of two full meals and nearly 90 grams of sugar, roughly equivalent to the sugar content of 7 glazed donuts. While a milkshake is expected to be an indulgence, the sheer density of calories and sugar in this beverage is in a class of its own.